Steps to War: Abandonment
You have an enemy, and he really wants you to know that every person you care about, both now and in the future, is going to abandon you. He is going to remind you daily of the fact that your parents divorced when you were young, and that one or both of them got caught up and distracted in what they thought was some type of new freedom, and you were moved to the side. You got left behind. Abandoned.
And do you remember that relative that died? Or maybe it was your best friend, or a brother or sister. That person that you loved – I mean really, REALLY loved – that just unexpectedly, tragically died. Not only did they die, they left you here – alone and abandoned.
That thing that happened to you. Yes, the one you’ve never really told anyone about. Where were your parents? The people tasked with taking care of you – where were they? They weren’t paying attention, which when you think about it was actually the rule and not the exception. They were never paying attention. They abandoned you, left you to battle all of it by yourself.
Your enemy desires nothing more than to see you living in perpetual shame and fear. He wants you to alienate yourself from everything and everybody – to just be alone – because being alone means no one can ever abandon you. And when you’re alone, you can focus all of your thoughts and energy on the unbelievable amount of guilt you carry. Guilt? Why guilt? Because surely you must have done something to cause all of these people to abandon you. This must somehow be your fault.
You being alone is probably for the best, anyway. Any relationship you’ve tried to have in the past has evaporated into the sky because of your insecurities, your “clinginess.” You start to get nervous and edgy when he doesn’t text you back quickly enough. If she’s five minutes later than she said she would be, you start calling her. Where are you? You know where she is…she’s preparing to abandon you. Because that’s what people do. People leave.
Confess your brokenness to God. Go to your Father with openness, transparency, and honesty. Lay your fear of abandonment at His feet and ask Him to do with it as he will. You will carry it no longer.
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. – 1 John 1:9
Tell God you’re tired of feeling this way. Tell Him you don’t want to live like this anymore. You are coming to Him in search of freedom.
No, I tell you; but unless you repent, you will all likewise perish. – Luke 13:3
Ask God to cleanse your way of thinking. Ask Him to reveal the truth to you. State that you are casting out the lies of the enemy, and ask Him to replace them with the truth of His word.
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. – Romans 12:2
Outcome of Battle:
You are not, and have never – even for one second – been abandoned and alone.
Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you. – Deuteronomy 31:6
Your Father draws nearer to you every moment, and desires to heal your every hurt.
The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. – Psalm 34:18
You are not shackled to the past sins of other people. Nor are you dependent upon others for your future. God is your refuge, your portion.
Look to the right and see: there is none who takes notice of me; no refuge remains to me; no one cares for my soul. I cry to you, O Lord; I say, “You are my refuge, my portion in the land of the living. – Psalm 142:4-5
Your shame and guilt have been cancelled on the name and authority of Jesus Christ. Lay them down.
Instead of your shame there shall be a double portion; instead of dishonor they shall rejoice in their lot; therefore in their land they shall possess a double portion; they shall have everlasting joy. – Isaiah 61:7
You are a child of God. You are an heir to the Kingdom. Understand it, accept it, say it, walk in it.
And now, little children, abide in him, so that when he appears we may have confidence and not shrink from him in shame at his coming. If you know that he is righteous, you may be sure that everyone who practices righteousness has been born of him. See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. The reason why the world does not know us is that it did not know him. Beloved, we are God’s children now, and what we will be has not yet appeared; but we know that when he appears we shall be like him, because we shall see him as he is. And everyone who thus hopes in him purifies himself as he is pure. – 1 John 2:28 – 3:10